OK, not really much hope — hope and fear being opposite sides of the same coin. I guess I do fear that I will not continue to blog. I’ve tried journaling several times in my life, without much success. Fortunately, as there is not much hope, there is also not much fear. If I don’t continue to blog, then I’m exactly as out of touch with people as I already am. I’ve lost nothing that I already have.
But, perhaps this time is different too. Now, blogging is in fashion & it’s easy to do. I can type it instead of handwriting into a small book as I lie in bed. And probably most importantly, it’s easy to do from where I already am. I spend such an inordinate amount of time sitting cross-legged in my large leather office chair in front of the computer. Previously, I would keep a journal and pen beside the bed, and feel the duty of recording momentous thoughts at the end of the day. But usually, when I get in bed, it’s because I want to go to sleep. Not because I have something to say about that day, or this life or any such thing. So, in the past, journaling didn’t really happen. Now, maybe it will. Maybe it won’t. Only time will tell.
Sometimes, I feel like a fraud as a blogger. Hence the title “A Life More Ordinary”. Bloggers as a class do so much in terms of breaking news stories or calling to activism or simply as pulpit for well-reasoned arguments and timely thoughts generally on a specific topic as my friend bk does with lowercase liberty. Perhaps because she’s my wife, but Carolyn’s struggles with an academic life seem important or noteworthy in a way my own ramblings don’t. At the same time, I’ve noticed blogs with entries that are little more than illiterate complaints about the new Chinese restaurant down the block. So I guess I’m just somewhere in the blogging continuum. Neither black nor white but some shade of grey I care not to investigate. At least not much more than this already rambly treatise does.
At worst, this is simply a waste of my time. Well, no, I guess at worst this is a place for an evil stalker to learn about me and then come kill me. Or a source for some agent to gather material to use against me in some ill-conceived lawsuit or criminal trial as it becomes illegal to be me. At best, it’s a way for friends to become better acquainted with me, and possibly even for me to become better acquainted with myself. Quite a range of possibilities for a simple online publishing process — from death to enlightenment. I hope for enlightenment. (Ergo, I fear death.)
Well, welcome to my blog. 🙂